26th Jul. 2009 : Yann K. (philosopher,
writer, professor, husband and father) wakes-up with a mystic revelation
and says, at the age of 36 : "Now I fucking want to play E-guitar!"
Aug. 2009 : Yann K. buys a Les Paul and starts to play (very
10 Aug. 2009 : His friend Axel E. (35
y.o., consultant) says : "Ok, if you start the guitar, I must
start again with Bass-guitar...". And he fuckin' does it!
6th Nov. 2009 : Drunked after a metal
concert, Axel E. and Yann K.create the Cannibal
26th Jul. 2010 : Creation of www.cannibalpenguin.com
and official birth of CANNIBAL PENGUIN, the first and best Fuck
Metal Band ever. Cannibal Penguin starts from scratch...
following advertissement is published on the website :
4th sept. 2010 : Louis A-L finds the
advertissement and calls Yann K. on the phone... He is a former
"Republican Guard" in France. After killing zombies with
is mouth in Pakistan, he comes back to France. One day, he goes
out with his dog, at the age of 42, and he comes back with a e-guitar.
After a discussion with
Yann about Punk, Rock, Metal, Richard Wagner, baroque classical
opéra and beer, Louis becomes the 2d. guitarist of Cannibal
Penguin. He plays very badly also... He takes the name of STREET
21st sept. 2010 : André-Charles
I., drummer, movie maker and very very mad boy wants to join the
band. Axel, Louis and Yann try to convince him not to do such a
stupid thing : "Don't do it ! You would be the only one to
play correctly your instrument!". But waved by suicidal tendencies,
he insists and becomes the drummer...
1st oct. 2010 : After meeting God for
the second time (or something he really believes is God), Yann K.
has a second revelation... He takes the stage name BEEFCAKE
and plays with make-up... The result frightens his wife but makes
children laugh... Fuck Metal is moving forward ! Or backward...
Anyway ! It's moving...
5th. oct. 2010 : After breaking his
leg, Beefcake's neighbour, Yannick M., also has a revelation...
He immediatly converts to Fuck Metal. He could be the singer of
the band. But after the first rehearsal he decides that he is not
ready yet for this terrifying experience. He decides to spend 10
years in a Fuck Metal community in Las Vegas.
27th oct. 2010 : The spirit of Dimebag
Darrel comes personnaly at the 5th rehearsal of the band. He writes
"The 10 Commandments of Fuck Metal". Curiously given in
french, there are 11 of them !
Pour faire du Fuck métal, bois de la bière
Si tu sais bien jouer de ton instrument, ne fais pas du Fuck
Si tu es nul, vas-y !!! Year ! Fuck Métal !
Adore les pingouins cannibals
Fais ce que tu veux
Fais n’importe quoi, mais fais-le bien…
Si tu fais des fausses notes, monte la disto et dis que c’est
ça le Fuck Métal (cf. Kurt Cobain)
Si tu veux te suicider, prends plutôt une bière
Si tu veux toujours te suicider, compose une balade trash
sur les pingouins cannibales.
Si tu crois que tu chantes trop aigu ou trop grave, dis que
c’est comme ça que se chante le Fuck Métal.
Le Fuck Métal c’est toi !
Nov. 2010 : BEEFCAKE decides to become,
not only a bad guitar player, but also a bad singer. The group is
Dec. 2010 : Axel E. buys a new bass
: silver color and very bad sound. He also buys a silver T-Shirt
and a silver helmett. He finally finds what he wants to do with
his life : sustenable Fuck Metal! He takes the stage name of SILVER
After this, the story is to long to
tell... The telepathic penguins tried to avoid the raise of Cannibal
Penguin... Silver fucker and the drummer Sticky Fingers were killed
in a so-called accident. A new group was formed with Bernard Hinault
(Bass) and Carolux (Drums).
March 2013 : After a couple of fucking succesful
concerts and a new drummer, Cannibal Penguin seems to be on the
way to a worldwide fame. But Carolux is intoxicated by telepathic
penguins and must stop playing the drums. A new drummer arrives.
Maxime M is quite younger (25 y.o.) and has NO BRAIN at all. That
is why he was not able to find a new name. That is why we keep on
calling him Carolux.
- September 2014 : CANNIBAL PENGUIN enters
an art Galery and plays in a performing art festival at the well
known 59 Galery in the middle of Paris. People finally understood
that CANNIBAL PENGUIN and Fuck Metal is not really music. It's more
a way of living and thinking, like people who only eat peanuts or
like Jean-Paul Sartre.
gonna be a great success. Why? Because the
new drummer looks really very stupid... And he is !
SAYS I'M NOT?